The Battle of Anorexia.

This eating disorder is a silent monster that kept me as a prisoner for a long time.

In order to heal I had to realize its connection to the wounds from my past and focus on what I wanted in life.

At the heart of my struggle, there was always a strong desire for control. Anorexia became my way of trying to take charge over my mind, body and life. I became very strict regarding food and my punishments towards myself when I failed were hard and painful. I carefully counted calories, weighed every bit of food very precisely, and exercised a lot. These habits made me feel like I was in control of my body, molding it to some perfect image. I was trying to make my life feel less chaotic. But it was like chasing something that wasn't real. The strange thing about anorexia is that it offers a feeling of control but it actually takes away your freedom. The more I chased this idea of control, the more I lost control over everything else. My body got weaker, my health got worse, and I lost control over everything. The struggle just kept me going in a bad circle. The more I tried, the more I lost control. Being malnourished and getting sicker made me even more trapped by this disorder.

People say that you can get well from anorexia. And I believe you can, but it is a hard and complicated journey. It is not only about getting well from the illness, it is also about understanding the source and heal from the inside and out. After many years of suffering and searching for a solutions, I had a breakthrough. My eating disorder wasn't just about control; it was also about the need to be disconnected from my own body because of childhood traumas. In order to survive I had to disconnected myself with my body and the eating disorder gave me a fake feeling of control.

In order to heal I had to accept and understand that all of this was together the result of the many different bad things that had happened to me. And the way back was going to be long. I deep dived into therapy, yoga, meditation and breath-work. I faced the connection between anorexia and my childhood trauma. But as they say:

"Even in the darkest soil, blooms the possibility of unexpected flowers."

This long and hard journey of healing made me understand myself better, and now I want to help others grow. Feel better and live the life that they dream of.

Tips on how to handle struggles - such as anorexia

It's important to recognize that recovery is a journey, and seeking professional help is a courageous step towards reclaiming a life free from the harmful grip of anorexia. A journey that might require a multifaceted approach that addresses both the physical and mental aspects of the disorder.

1. The Therapeutic way - figuring out where it started and start the healing trip based on that.

Therapy is aimed to understand the source of one's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It's a process to explore past experiences, relationships, and patterns that may contribute to the current challenges. This form of therapy often seeks to uncover the underlying factors that shape one's perspective and reactions to various situations. By gaining insights into the source of thoughts and behaviors, individuals can develop a deeper understanding of themselves, allowing for personal growth, emotional healing, and the potential for positive change.

2. Coaching - find out what you want and not want in life and start the healing trip based on that. Coaching strategies can play a crucial role in fostering positive lifestyle changes. A coach is like a supportive navigator, guiding you through the twists and turns of personal development. They specialize in helping individuals set and achieve specific goals, providing motivation, encouragement, and practical strategies along the way. A coach isn't just someone who imparts wisdom; they're a collaborative partner, helping you unlock your potential and overcome obstacles. Whether it's in sports, life, or specific areas like health and wellness, a coach empowers you to discover and maximize your strength.

The synergy between therapy and coaching creates a powerful combination. While therapy addresses the underlying psychological factors, coaching focuses on implementing practical, daily strategies to rebuild a healthy relationship with food and body. The support system provided by both avenues reinforces a comprehensive approach to recovery.

In conclusion, anorexia is a tough enemy, and it's often connected to many personal issues. For me, understanding the link between the desire of control, the childhood traumas and the self-hate was like a key to recovery. Anorexia is like a puzzle with many twists. A puzzle you can solve if you dare and are brave enough to say stop to the self destruction

Please do get in contact if you want guidance ❤️

//Lina Edenfelt Holst - Evolution & Wellbeing Coach